Lost Loves, Found Loves by Anonymous

                       
There are all kinds of Loves: old loves, new loves, good loves, bad loves, comfortable loves and exciting loves.

Over our lives we experience them all, and all of them make each of us more complete persons. Our loves inspire us, anger us, excite us, bore us, enlighten us, and frustrate us. Unfortunately love is not everything we need to create a lasting relationship. We need time together, time apart, flexibility, respect, trust and most importantly letting each other "be me". There are times it becomes evident that we find ourselves in a place that has become dangerous. Sometimes we can make little changes to our behaviors, to our goals or to our needs, freshening up a relationship.  We use that flexibility required to shore up our love. Sometimes it is impossible to make the changes -- unless one person changes who they are in a huge way. Oft times those changes make a relationship untenable; the change required will make one of us into a new person.  Too incompatible or needing changes so great that none of the persons involved are able to flex that much... Then we have a lost love.

Lost loves are painful, emotional, frustrating, and sometimes debilitating. Yet they are often times the most valuable of experiences -- because they become a source  of immense personal growth. When all parties realize and accept that things must change there something comes into being as valuable as a love and that is a treasured friendship. When not everyone can accept necessary change it becomes difficult. It can easily result in the need for a permanent split from each other's company. Almost everyone experiences this kind of ending. Would that everyone would experience the former kind of ending as well.    

We all also experience found loves. The excitement, allure, confusion, doubt, and personal growth found in this kind of love are treasures. Some of these loves burn with the fire of a supernova -- rapidly expending the energy they contain within and so hastening their ending. Some of these loves burn for years, only to unexpectedly explode as some fuse ignites explosives hidden beneath the sand. Some of these found loves grow and burn for decades, dying a natural death at the end of their years.

One can rarely tell which kind of love one has found at their beginning. The intentions of all parties usually is to burn for decades -- ending naturally. Life is rarely that easy!  In the end all a person can do is be him or herself.  Love unconditionally.   Work to grow one's love.  Endure whatever fate may bring.