Thoughts of a New Submissive Male
For years I have hidden these desires.. Thoughts played out in my dreams and behind closed doors,… Self-inflicted play with toys, clamps, a pretend partner, her faceless demands controlling my imagination..
How can this be?
I am a military man, a law enforcement officer; I can’t have these unmanly desires? These feelings of submission……. it isn't right!
I have to know why I am this way, Why I feel this way, who am I? Where do I find the answers to these questions?
I can’t take it anymore, I turn to the Internet, I look for other men who might be like me… Oh My God there are a lot of us, I feel somewhat at ease with my feelings, I dive deeper into the topic, I see that I fall into the category of a Submissive male…
Wow!! There are women, who love these men.. A Mistress, oh wait what is BDSM? What is a female lead relationship? What is a D/s relationship? Man, I have a lot to read about and to learn.
Holly fuck, a Mistress is a women who will guide a sub, teach a sub… Am I into BDSM? Do I want a D/s relationship? Is this where I am meant to be? Is this my life?
I have to meet others, my Internet search finds tons of porn sites, wow did she really just stick a metal rod down his cock? Fuck I am hard watching this! OMG she has him tied up and she is hitting him so hard on his ass, my cock grows harder! Ok focus, I need to find a Mistress….
Fetlife, what is this? Damn! Look at all the Subs, Doms, Switches!!! How does this work? I have to make an on line profile, ok I can do that…
I fill out the questions to set up my profile.
What name should I use? Will it be clever enough to get the attention of a female dom?
DO I put a face picture? OMG I am so nervous, my hands are sweaty……., fuck it, no guts no glory…
I make the profile, then I spend the next few weeks searching, leaving messages , checking to see if I get a response daily!
Damn no responses…
Check the next day, Oh there’s a response, she lives close, oh wait she wants money and a cuckold, I don’t think that’s me…. Look up what a cuckold is. Wow!!! That’s hot but really not for me….
Ok now where was that video of that Miss locking her boy in a chastity device? Here is is, damn that’s hot.. Ok I am ordering a CB6000, maybe I just need to find a key holder…
Back to fetlife.
I look for female dom’s in the local area, Hmmm, here’s one, she says she is just looking for friends and lives the life style when she can, maybe she would be willing to chat with me…
Damn, what do I write?
How can I get this lady to respond to me?
There are so many submissive males on this site, surely she has a sub, or at least gets a ton of messages from subs,
How am I gonna stand above the rest?
Be nice, be respectful, tell her who you are and how much you long to serve a Miss in real life! That should do it!! No screw that, just be nice, be yourself, and say hello! Let her know you just want a key holder… that will work!!!
Two days go by and no answer, fuck!!!!!! oh well maybe it is my purpose to have these feelings and desires and not to share them with any one…..
The next day, I have an answer from her!!! She liked my post, she said it was nice and very polite, she wants to talk more!!!!! Holly shit is this real… Ok slow down, be cautious, how do you know she isn’t a dude or some crazy lady…. Ok answer her, say thanks for replying, ask her how her day is, most of all don’t seem desperate.
A few days go by, she asks me if I know what Second Life is, well I have no clue, so she shows me how to make an account and log in, she also wants me on Skype, Damn doesn’t she know I wanna meet in real life not some fucking computer game, , ok slow down, do as she wants…
WOW! Second life and a place called the Dominion, hmmm fuck this place has a lot of rules! Ok play along, we start chatting daily in SL, oh shit she wants to meet in person!!!! Hell Yes!!!!!!
The day of the meeting, a park, in our town. It's only like 4 miles from my house, damn do we live that close to each other? As I pull up I see her, sitting on a bench, damn she is tiny! I tower over her, wow, what a beautiful face, OMG she has a smile to match…. We embrace with a hug, she ask me how I am doing, why am I so nervous, we walk to a bench and talk for about an hour… It was mainly “surface” questions, how old are ya, have you ever played in real life ect…..
As I leave another hug and a huge smile, I think to myself as I get in the car, she is a DOM? How can that be, she looks like a school teacher, so innocent and refined. I wonder if she will be on 2nd life tonight!
OMG she is here, she says she loved our meeting and would like to see me again!!!! Oh I am soooo liking this, she wants to talk about kinks and she is giving me task, she wants to know what I think a sub is? She wants to know a lot about me… Is this a red flag? I am a bit worried, but damn she is sooo hot!!!! Role with it, feel her out, she is feeling me out… Ask her questions,
She wants to meet again this time she wants me to pick the place, she wants it to be a different park, ok the one by my house, at 1pm Saturday!!!!!
I show up, she liked my answers about what a sub is, and what giving up control is, and what I thought about power exchange.. We embrace again!! Her smile makes me melt, I still cant believe this pretty little lady is a DOMME!!! We walk to a isolated place in the park, she sits on bench, I look at her she raises an eye brow, I ask her if I can sit, she says, “no why don’t you kneel in front of me” WHAT?" Was what came to mind, but I did what she said and kneeled in front of her, I felt a bit embarrassed here, we are in public, I really don’t know her and I am kneeling before her,
She smiles down at me, she says, “hands behind your back boy”.. Of course I do as I am told, she smiles at me and ask how I am feeling, I tell her I feel ok, and she reaches up with her hand and pinches my right nipple, OMG my eyes roll back in my head as she apply more pressure, I cant believe this is happening!!!! My cock try’s to get hard,, but the CB 6000 prevents that, the pain of the cage along with her pinching my nipple is over whelming, my breathing is heavy, I feel the pebbles from the ground I am kneeling on digging into my knees, so much pain and pleasure at the same time, I open my eyes slightly she is smiling as she moves her hand from one nipple to the next, I fall forward leaning against her, she whispers in my ear “Good Boy”
That was five months ago, now I am owned by this Miss, and live to please her. Every time we are together she takes me to new highs and I serve her to the fullest.
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