Finally Where I Belong

Submitted by: Evangeline Eames


It's not a confession, more of a reminisence. Remembering certain things in my life that were like flags waving, markers on the roadside, telling me which turns to take on this journey towards being Domme.

I have mentioned this before, the first time I remember the switch being thrown on my taste for bondage: I was maybe 7 or 8, playing cowboys and indians in my parents basement. There was a metal pole running from the floor to the ceiling - a support - and we were taking turns tying each other up. I remember wanted to be tied tighter, and the strange sense of excitement I felt tying others up. That switch has never been turned off.

I was bossy and even aggressive with boys as a teenager, and felt a thrill when I could best them or overpower them mentally or even physically (although that generally required some planning). I think I actually scared a few of my early boyfriends, not wanting them to move, wanting them to be passive, and even tying one up..although I really wasn't sure what to do past that.

I definitely disturbed more than one boy with my forays in to the ass area. I remember one moving my hand aside when he figured out what I had in mind and another simply getting up and walking out of the room. I've heard subs say that they felt like a freak at times. Well, as a domme I have too.

When I reached my mid twenties I became exposed to BDSM through the internet as well a few giggling forays in to the local fetish clubs (mostly gay). This was it, I thought. This is what I am feeling, this is what I want.

As I get older, my tastes have become more specific and my preferences crystalized. I like boys. I like retraining them. I like disciplining them. I like owning them. I like restricting them. I like fucking them like they are girls. To be here, with all of you, who accept that, who enjoy it too, and hell, who even think it is normal, is amazing. Acceptance. Everyone wants it. And here, I've found it.