Confession by Matti

 My name is Micael, I m 26 yers old and I was hitchhiking to Portugal with a friend of mine, when we got stranded somewhere between France and Spain. Standing on the ramp to the motorway, the few cars who took to the ramp were mostly occupied  by German families, filled with air mattresses, snorkels and sunburned kids. It was already past noon by now and we had been standing here since the crack of dawn. I noticed how my arms and face also got burnt by the sun, no shade just heat. We ran out of things to say hours ago. I was thinking, I m tooo old for this shit - I should just be sitting on an easyJet or train, as i was cursing my nostalgic friend who talked me into this idea. Why would anyone take us? Flies buzz, the sun shined. A honk. We both looked up and saw a car on the other side of the street. My mate jumped up and full of hope  - ran over to talk. He leaned down to the window. I made out the driver and at least one girl on the back seat. My friend came back, explaining that they were going to a town half way to our destination, but only had one spare seat. We argued back and forth and I told him to go with them and that we would meet in Lisbon. I already sketched out my plan to pack and walk to the train station. He looked at me making sure it really was okay and I reassured him, giving him a hug and waving him off: ‘I ll be fine! Don’t worry! I watched them drive up the ramp and walked back to my backpack... 

I'm woken. Woken by a jolt. I must have nodded out…I tilt my head, but see nothing. I' m in the boot of a car. I hear the engine roar. Past events come in flashes. I remember the road.

 A bottle green Range Rover. A young couple. The woman was driving. I recall happily entering their car. They were both Spanish, she introduced herself as Maria and her partner on the passenger seat as Julio. I remember looking at her bare legs from the back seat as she pushed down the gas pedal. I remember her red nails as her fingers wrapped around the gear stick, her long hazelnut coloured hair blown by the wind coming through her open window. I remember her eyes catching mine in the rear view mirror as I was oggling her. 

She said she would bring me to the next bigger town, there I could catch the intercity train. I remember feeling so lucky. Lucky that I was on my way and lucky to spend the next two hours sitting here on these luxurious leather seats flirting and chatting. I remember stretches of desert outside. Small empty villages and me thinking what on earth must one have done to end up living here? 

It's dark. I try to lift my arm to touch my head. I can’t. It s hot and I m sweating. My hands hurt a little as the rope Julio tied me with rubs against my wrists behind my back. I realise that I must sound crazy - but I wilfully agreed to this…or did I? I feel dizzy, my thoughts jump and race….Yes, I stepped into the boot of Maria s Range Rover deliberately. Well, she did push me in at the end and slammed it shut, me being frightened a little that I might have angered her somehow. 

How did it come to this?  Let me  try explain. 

As I lay uncomfortably in the car boot, weary of the next bump on what must be my grovel road, behold, I am thinking back.

Two hours into our drive Maria had slowed and stopped the car in the middle of nowhere. Julio disappeared, probably to take a piss behind some shrubs. I got out as well and watched Maria stretch her long beautiful arms over her head. She smiled at me. After complementing me on my adventurous spirit she asked me out of the blue if I ever had random sex with a stranger. 

I was perplexed, fixating on her beautiful red lips, trying to read her dark brown eyes. Before I could answer she came up close and ran her nails down over my sunburnt shoulder as I bit my lip, being very turned on. I winced and wondered about Julio when she shot again out of the blue asking with her low silky voice: “Are you a masochist? You seem to be reacting in a very unexpected manner to my touch.” She smiled at me. It was this devious smile of hers combined with her incredible voice which must have cast a...psycho-sexual spell on me.

 All I could do was nod and smile back sheepishly before I gathered myself trying to respond in style. Just when I was about to start, she cut me short and walked around her car, her black ankle boots grinding into the dusty earth as she opened the boot. I followed her with my eyes. She beckoned me over. I glanced inside the boot, there was a blanket, a dog bed…ropes. It looked very cleaned up and new. I looked back towards her trying to process what I saw, when she reached inside the boot and grabbed the rope with her right hand. Slowly, Maria walked up close to me and stepped on my right foot with her left. She wrapped her hand around my waist and pulled me close. She placed a kiss on my cheek and brought her lips very close to my ear.

The desert wind blew warmth across my chest. She whispered, her smooth voice teasing my ear drum: “ You can choose to be taken to my house, if you so wished. If…you felt adventurous.” She smiled at me, her big, soft lips so close. Or…she could just drop me off at the train station…"It really is not far anymore from here now, just a 15 minute drive." 

I swallowed hard, feeling her hand still resting on my hip as I became aware of my bulge squeezing desperately inside my pants. I looked up, catching a breeze in the late afternoon sun. Julio had reappeared without me noticing. Maria stretched out her arm to her side, holding out the rope without averting her eyes from mine. Without words, Julio came up to take it from her and walked behind me. 

Has Julio ever said a word, I wonder? Why was he so quiet? 

I kept looking at Maria, yearning to hear her voice again as I felt Julio take my arms and pull them behind my back slowly. I could have resisted. Maria smiled at me and came closer again, approving of my decision. I felt like putty. I wanted Marias approval and I loved her attention. As Julio expertly tied my hands behind my back, Maria slowly unbuttoned my shirt and reached in to brush my nipples. I let out a moan, embarrassed and capitulating inside me, feeling a deep turmoil within my chest, I felt immediate relief as I breathed out. Maria smiled at me triumphantly and squeezed my nipples harder, and harder as I groaned out loud and jumped back in surprise, when I realised that Julio has finished tying me and even though I twisted and turned,  I was unable to free my arms. Maria laughed at me, her voice a mix of excitement and pity, perhaps. 

I turned to her, as the pain ebbed away from my nipples. My heart jumped in my chest as she guided me towards the boot, her hand pushing me softly from behind. Her smell and touch so close. She asked me again, “So - I take it you want to come with us, little boy? “ I looked at her and nodded. Maria looked at me, almost insulted: “ Is that how you answer me? A silent nod?” 

Immediately I felt the urge to say “Yes”. “Yes Maria.” She looked at me silently - her dark eyes piercing deeply inside my soul. “ I ….I …want to come with you” I stammered, as I stood wiggling before her, my fingers fumbled behind my back. Maria broke into a faint smile and suddenly, without warning, slapped her palm across my cheek, throwing her head back excitedly as I stumbled sideways to find Julio steady me. I shivered a little. She looked at me imploringly. “ You gonna cry now ? Like a little baby?” She pouted her lips in mock pity as she stretched out her finger towards the tip of my nose. 

As I grappled with my pride, she took my arm and shoved me in the boot of her car. I looked up at her sparkling eyes as the lid closed over me, shrouding me in darkness. I heard their steps as they walked away to open the car doors. I felt my heart beat hard. My head spun, my cheek burnt and my sunburnt shoulders rubbed against the rough blanket.

Suddenly I heard steps again. Maria. She opened the boot briskly and leaned over me holding something in her hand. Did she seem annoyed with me? I tried to read her mood as I helplessly stared at her, feeling very exposed and vulnerable, with my hands tied behind me and my shirt half off my body, laying twisted on my side. Slowly Maria grabbed my hair, shoved a rubber penis gag in my mouth and tightened it behind my head. I mumbled and whimpered as my eyes tried to catch hers. She stood back and looked at me, seemingly satisfied with herself as I wiggled before her. “ Now you can ponder in silence for the remainder of our trip how you want to answer like a grown up - adding after a moments silence “Should I decide to ask you something again, little boy.“ She giggled as she closed the lid, slammed the lid shut, leaving me filled and alone and at her mercy, with the image of her foot pressing down on the gas pedal, burnt on my mind as she accelerated, delivering her willful bounty to her hidden realm.