*****************************************************************
There is a boy whom I am interested in but I don't like to push. I think he would do well....
Don't know what to do! I don't chase boys. I mean, never.
*****************************************************************
I've Loved you since the moment we met, And as each day goes by my Love for you grows and blossoms into a something amazing, something magnificent. I never knew I could feel this way about someone, to want to be yours and only yours for the rest of my life. This feeling is terrifying and intoxicating at the same time, I never want to lose this feeling.
*****************************************************************
A Pedestrian Fetish
Where does the foot fetish come from? The desire to kneel there and press one's lips against a Lady's sole? Or to drag the tongue along the side of her Louboutins? High heels, wedge heels, no heels at all. It's a part of the body that never fails to get my attention. At times I've done it in real life and tears came to my eyes. And I'm left wondering of Ladies actually get anything at all out of having it done. That last part makes me sad: to think that such passion goes unrequited.
kiss, kiss
*****************************************************************
I love to have my pussy sucked.
*****************************************************************
i still worry that i am not enough sometimes, but i'm okay with that. finally.
*****************************************************************
i never expected things to work out this way, never expected to love you like this. surely there have been those before, and perhaps there will be others to come, but in this moment with you i've no desire for either. i feel found too.
*****************************************************************
I’m writing this anonymously to just try and clear the remorse I feel over what turned out to be a very bad turn of events while temporarily owned after being auctioned off to a Lady. I just sigh in frustration over the whole thing. I ended up lying to the Lady because I had made a faulty conclusion about the nature of sl and had lied to myself about what I really wanted. I’m learning that lies you tell yourself transfer and become clear, when you try to be honest to someone else and it’s not until you hear it come out of your lips that you realize what you were thinking or deluding yourself with isn’t the truth. But this probably isn’t going to make sense with the specifics. I am going to start with my intentions for the period after the auction and how that view has changed.
I was expecting to be bought for my period of service and after maybe continue to serve her in sl if all worked out. At the time I did have an alt in a complex relationship. It had started as a sl d/s relationship but fell away from that over time. Mostly because we were hardly speaking. The problem that again I didn’t understand completely was that I resented her because we could never go real life with her real life entanglements. She was married and had a kid. And I had gotten in the relationship hoping that my love for her would be enough to sublimate my yearn for a real life. And when it didn’t, I became resentful, and she was sensitive and picked up that I was spending less time with her. So she spent less time with me and we fed on that. Somewhere along the line I stopped calling her Mistress and she stopped insisting on it and I was no longer taking real life instructions.
I had hurt the Lady is was in the relationship with before by pushing her aside when I got the chance, or what I thought was the chance, at real life. I knew it wasn’t fair to her to keep doing this to her. So I figured if I changed my thinking, I could satisfy my longings. So decide she was my rl and thought that by calling her that, it would be so But I still longed to serve a Mistress. And had resigned myself that second life was the best I could do, until; brave enough to go out into the real world and look. Thus, I entered the auction.
Things progressed nicely. Until I had logged in to talk to my former Mistress. We got locking in an argument. I had told her before hand my plan. But she still needed reassurance. In my want to tell the Lady who bought me everything, I im’d her and asked for a break and then started the crazy conversation that sounded like I was equivocating. “Are you owned now?”
Though I had not called her Mistress in months, the alt I was on still wore her collar, so I said, “Sort of” And thus began the whirling conversation. I told her that my former Mistress was my real life, because I had assumed she was busy in real life. She told me I had jumped to conclusions. And my heart leapt. Literally leapt and I went out of my mind. The thing I had wanted most was possible! It became blurry as I contradicted myself left and right, realizing that though I called her real life it wasn’t so. That what I wanted was in front of me. But it was too late I looked like a lying player. And the remainder of my auction time we spent apart.
Miss, I’m sorry I equivocated and lied. But it was my desire to be honest with.
0 comments:
Post a Comment