“In my life as in the lives of most men there was a critical point of transformation from the universal to the particular, a place of terror and darkness, of confusion and loneliness, a day of unspeakable torpor and emptiness, whose evening brought forth new stars in the sky and new eyes within me.
Have you ever been lost at sea and seen a swimmer approaching from the land? Have you ever, recovering from deathly illness, taken a first draft of fresh garden air and felt the sweet surge of your reviving blood?
Incipit vita nova. I became a new man, still a miracle to myself, at once passive and active, receiving and giving, in possession of treasures, the most precious of which is perhaps till unknown to me. “
Incipit Vita Nova, Hermann Hesse 1899
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I think back today to about 30 years ago, when I first read Incipit Vita Nova and the impact it had on me then and still has on me today. I was young, idealistic and very much in desperate need of friendship and love. I was a typical late teens male – I was shy around women, a bit of a nerd type who honestly preferred to read a book on a Saturday night than go out with other teens and get drunk. I was not naïve but had little experience with women . I had been going through a very difficult time at school back home. My girlfriend back in the US had just dumped me, after only three months, and I thought my life was over. A trip to southern Europe was in the cards for the summer, and I dreaded the thought of being away from her and being dragged away with my parents.
It was in southern Spain that long ago summer that I met Anna - a time and place forever etched in my soul. She was older than me, almost ten years my senior and although I did not realize it at the time, possessed the trade marks of a sensual sadist. She was beautiful and sophisticated. The summer was glorious, Mediterranean and warm. The smell of olive groves, flowers and red wine cellars the scent of which still , to this day brings the memories of her washing across me like a tidal wave crashing on the Atlantic western shores of Iberia.
It all began innocently enough with Anna. Her parents owned the “quinta” we were staying at. My father had rented the guest cottage on their property for the entire summer. The estate itself was enormous, several hectares of olive groves , with riding stables, swimming pools, and tennis courts. I soon found out that Anna was of Basque and German ancestry, who spoke perfect but delightfully accented English, living I was almost 19 at the time – she was 28. Despite our age difference, we became fast friends.My days were filled with swimming, horseback riding and playing tennis. Later I would spend time working in the stables grooming her horses. Most of my evenings were also spent with Anna, talking about our day. She was an accomplished equestrian, commanding and almost regal as she controlled the stallions, riding them hard, yet with a subtle grace. When she would leave in the evenings, to walk across the fields to the manor house , the moonlight reflecting off of her ebony hair , I would gaze lovingly at her silhouette the scent of her perfume and hair would linger in my senses. Like many boys, my age, I would lay outside, under the Spanish night skies and masturbate. In my eyes, she was nothing short of a Goddess. She was petite (she was not much more than 5-feet 2-inches tall), large breasted and had the most exquisite bottom. My head would fill with thoughts of her long, jet black curly hair, which when not tied back would fall down her back to well below her delightfully curved waist. I would climax under the night sky in what was to become an almost nightly adoration and fixation on the beautiful Anna.
The thing about Anna was how she had stirred feelings in me that were almost primordial. Suddenly, in the blink of an eye, I was back to watching that movie on the television from long ago. Once again, I recalled, from when I was most likely not more than eight years old, a scene from a movie that had caused a powerful warmth and a stirring. It was a movie about the Roman Empire and the scene was that of a stately Roman Galleon on the high seas, slaves down below rowing as the task Master would whip them, to ensure that they maintained a satisfactory pace, their bruised ankles clearly leashed to heavy chains, thick unbreakable ankle manacles securely locked . The crack of the bullwhip, the loud cries and the welts on the naked flesh had left an indelible mark on my soul. At that time I had no idea what the feelings were that I was experiencing, how could I , but when Anna mounted her horses and looked down at me, her voice soft but commanding, it brought back those very same feelings, repeated with increasing intensity throughout the years, leading to many hours of increasingly frantic masturbation, feelings that are apparently being triggered by something deep within my psyche and being.
About the end of second week together, it was early July and blistering hot in southern Spain we had been swimming in her pool when she asked me , but it was more of a command, if I would apply the sun cream to her back . We were alone on the property, except for the occasional sounds of dogs barking and the horses in the stables. She turned around on the chaise, lying flat on her belly and told me to unhook the top of her bikini so I could apply the sun cream. I did not hesitate and began to work the scented cream into her back, observing her well-formed shoulder muscles and silky smooth skin. Her skin was quite dark, and I recalled her saying that her grandfather was originally from Sicily, and her grandmother was of Sephardic Jewish heritage. I noticed that when lying flat in that manner that her long dark curly strands fell past her waist and covered a good deal of her bikini-covered bubble butt.
“Stephen”, she said my name in her delightful accented English, “Be a dear and tie my hair using that hair bow on the table and massage the cream into my back.”
I immediately took the dark red hair bow and began to collect the endless strands of hair, working them together and tying them , glad that she was lying face down as my penis was now hard in my speedo style swim shorts. I pulled her heavenly hair into a long ponytail and returned my focus to administering the cream into her skin. As I worked, she did not say much except words like “higher” or “harder” or “yes that’s perfect.”
“That’s enough,” she said, and without warning turned around and sat up on the chaise, her breasts naked now. I almost stopped breathing as my heart pounded in my throat. Her breasts were quite large for such a petite woman, and the areola were just enormous and a deep, dark, chocolate-like colour.
She pointed to the table and said “Steve be a dear and hand me my tank top.”
“Of course” I barely could speak as I handed her the top and watched as she slipped it on over her head, pulling the long ebony ponytail through the top, my face crimson with excitement knowing she could see my erection growing in my swim shorts.
Anna, I had noticed, seldom wore a bra around the house, and like many Southern European women would often go out in public without one as well, so I had a good idea of what to expect but seeing her heavenly naked breasts for the first time was more than I could take as my heart pounded and my face burnt red. They bounced out as if escaping the unnecessary confines of her tight tank top.
Anna’s eyes glanced at my covered erection as she began to brush her hair, a slight smile on her face but yet almost indifferent to my situation.
“I see you like my tits,” she said, her accented English and choice of words making my penis throb. She always was so proper and sophisticated. As she spoke she put down the hairbrush and stood up ,leaning down, she slipped off her bikini bottoms, sliding them down her shapely thighs, her hair covering her face and hiding most of her naked body from my glassy eyes. I could, however, see that she had no pubic hair covering her pussy. She turned her back to me quickly and leaned down she picked up her dark beige tight riding trousers, given me a full view of that beautifully shaped naked ass of hers as she stepped into her riding pants, slipping them up her thighs, wiggling and sliding them over that large bubble bottom as I realized then that she must never wear panties. Turning to face me again her next words struck me like a lightning bolt. “Show me Stephen,” she said looking at my swim shorts as she reached for her dark brown leather riding boots.
“Anna,” I blurted out. “Show you, w..what ?” I stammered.
“Your cock”, she said matter of fact, again her choice of words making my penis drip , as she pushed her small foot into the tight fitting riding boot as she continued to get dressed, slipping on her black leather riding gloves.I paused for a few seconds and noticed a sterner look on her face, and then just pulled my swim shorts down to my knees, my fully erect penis popping out as my hands trembled.
She began to smile now, looking up from her boots, her voice soft “Do you play with it Stephen?” And then not waiting for my answer she said, “Show me how you do it Stephen.”
This time without hesitation and almost like in a hypnotic trance I began to stroke my penis , my hand sliding up and down my erection as she watched, a studied look on her face, a look of curiosity mixed with indifference, as if she was reading a magazine. Given my almost nightly masturbatory fantasies about her over the last fortnight, it did not take me long to reach orgasm and I squirted cum all over the stone patio surrounding the swimming pool , the cum squirting only a few feet from where she now stood, in her riding boots, her nipples clearly visible through her tan tank top, as she continued to brush out her hair, the strands falling across her breasts. At the moment she was nothing short of a Goddess , as the late afternoon breezes blew through her hair, causing it to cover her face, her dark ruby red lips glistening in the late afternoon Spanish sun. Looking at me again she brushed her hair back into her dark red hair bow , then walked closer , looking down at the cum on the stone, she pressed the tip of her boot into the tiny puddle. She grabbed my still erect penis with her riding glove and gave it a tug and squeeze, then kissed me softly on the lips.
“I am late Stephen for my afternoon ride on Sebastian “ she continued “Why don’t we plan on going for another swim later tonight and be a darling and rinse out my bikini for me.”
With that, she again dipped the tip of her exquisite leather riding boot into the semen splattered stone and then stepped lightly on my naked foot, the cum dripping onto my foot. She wiggled the tip of the boot, smearing the semen on my toes and pressed harder. I almost fainted as she released the pressure and stepped away , quickly turning and heading in the direction of the riding stables. I watched her walk away, her long dark ponytail bouncing against the exquisite bubble-butt of hers that completely filled and stretched her riding pants. I struggled to pull my swim shorts up from my knees and cover my still erect and dripping penis.
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Incipit Vita Nova. I was reborn, deeply in love and captivated.
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