Saturday, October 8, 2011

He Was A Good Dog by Anon

He Was A Good Dog [anonymous]

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He was a good dog. He grew up not knowing of cages and leashes, not thinking of obedience nor of following, he was just a wild roaming puppy learning his way around.

Then one day, as he was meandering through his life, he stumbled upon something that was beyond his comprehension. Something that, in his time in this life, he had not anticipated nor seen before. He did not see the danger, but he did see the attraction...this 'Other' had a distinct attraction that beckoned him like nothing else ever had in his relatively short life. And so with curiosity and eagerness he walked into being 'Her' possession.

Taken home by his new 'Owner', he began to learn of things that would shape his life forever. Obedience without question, submission to 'Her' voice, 'Her' commands, 'Her' every whim. He did not see 'Her' as harsh and demanding, for 'She' was his first and thus far, only Owner, he had ever known.

His loyalty to Her was immeasurable. No command would he refuse. He learned of cages and leashes. Of punishment and of reward. He was as bound to Her as any could ever hope to be...and he was happy....he had never been happier in his life.

Then, it happened...in the blink of an eye...so quickly he could not comprehend was had happened...it seemed impossible to understand...inconceivable to his mind and a bombshell to his whole being...

She was gone....with but a few words, which at the time he could not, even would not be able to process, “I have to go, goodbye”, and 'She'...the 'Other' that for years now had been the center of his life...the reason for his life...the focus of all he was...was gone....he was abandoned.

He looked for Her, but there was no finding Her, She was gone...no trail...no hope of return...and he cried...it seemed for years.

Time is an evil mirror and as time went by he began to fear that which he had once loved. The hurt without a name, though it did have a name...'Abandonment'...a name he could not see, for to see it would be to forever change in his heart who She was...the hurt without a name turned what had been joy into fear...into hesitation...into abject terror of what he had had.

So he wandered for many, many years, remembering...forgetting...telling himself he was happy, that running free was good and that he was glad...but it was a lie...and eventually the darkness overtook him and he yearned for Ownership again.

But he was not the puppy he had once been.

Where he used to hear the sharp voice of an 'Other' as a call to run to with all abandon, he now flinched, felt the need to run, to flee, to hide. Where the thought of control had once brought security, he now felt fear and his blood would run cold and his body would seek to void itself in reaction.

The hurt was in control, but he could not see it...could not call its name...could not grasp what 'it'...abandonment...had done to his heart...to who he was...to who he had been.

Then one day...it seemed like any other day...but it was a day that would change his life...'They' found him.

'They' accepted him as he was...though he would pee the floor at a raised voice...though he would tend to step back when approached even in kindness...when his 'unknown' internal adversary would cause him to howl when any other dog would be content and happy, 'They' still kept him near...and he began to heal.

...I am the dog...
...You Ladies of the Dominion are the 'They' of which I speak...

I am home...finally...home.

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