Saturday, May 21, 2011

RL Meet Up Confessions By Heather

RL meet up ..

Exactly 369 days ago I was on a plane to the States. I had to go to either England or America for a course in school. I had to stay abroad for three months to improve my English. I tried to go to a summer camp but didn’t get hired due to a lack of skills! My Mistress at the time and I had joked around about me staying with her for three months, little did I know the joking would soon be over and it would become a reality. We made the arrangements and I told my parents I would be staying with a photographer that I had met on the internet, but I conveniently forgot to mention that online medium was SL and that the photographer I’d be staying with was actually my Mistress.

I had been nervous for days. I had horrible nightmares about the customs not letting me enter America or Brigid not recognizing me, even though we had been on cam many times before. My journey to the States was nothing short of being complete hell. I was interrogated by customs for over 90 minutes, they wanted to know every last detail of my trip and I knew for sure they would send me back to Holland and would never allow me to come back. The main issue seemed to be my English, they thought it was fine, so why should I stay in America to improve it? After explaining for the 10th time that it was mandatory for school they decided I could enter the States. I had missed my plane to Baltimore, due to the interrogation, but eventually was the last person to step on the last plane of the day. After a 24 hour trip, which only should have been 11 hours, I finally landed in Baltimore and was on my way to meet my Mistress.

I was so nervous. I wondered if it would be the same in SL, I wondered what the hell I should do if it didn’t work out. I was stuck there, I had no back-up plan other than to go see Claire, but I really didn’t want to bother her for three months.

Many people in SL had warned me that it wasn’t wise to go be with someone I really didn’t know for three months. I didn’t listen, I was completely smitten by Brigid and the idea of being away from home for three months.

After what seemed an eternity I laid eyes on Brigid and thought, “Holy hell, she’s tiny!” I am not a tall person, but she was short! I think she came up to my chest, which made me chuckle, because I find I hard to submit to people that are shorter than me, it’s stupid really. I gave her a hug and was at a loss for words, she wasn’t however. She gave me a big smile and told me to remove my scarf. I always wear a scarf in RL, I hide in it. She had told me that if I would bring it to the States she would burn it, which she didn’t thankfully, but I wasn’t allowed to wear it for three months either.

I have written before about my RL meet up with Brigid. The outcome has changed a bit, we are no longer together. I realize now, it wasn’t all as perfect as I thought it was. We had many ups and downs along the way and the downs truly scared me. Don’t take this the wrong way, because being with her was amazing. But it wasn’t as it should be. We were friends, but we weren’t in a D/s relationship. Or I should say, we weren’t in a D/s relationship as we were in RL. What was seen before as being a playful brat in SL, was seen as having an attitude in RL.

It is hard to look back on this now, as we are no longer together. Our relationship changed the moment I came back from the States. Brigid’s son had died and that changed her as a person, which I completely understand and it was hard having to go back to Holland, knowing what pain she was going through, I wanted nothing but to be there for her.

A RL meet up can be great. Mine, for the most part was, other parts.. not so much. I am very grateful that she took me into her house for three months. I am grateful for the time we had together, but I can’t help to think that our meet up in RL, changed our entire relationship, leading up the point where it no longer worked.

My meet up will always be a happy memory, with sad moments. I will never forget my time with them and I certainly don’t mean to say that my meet up was all bad. For anyone that will have the opportunity to meet someone in RL, don’t make it a three month stay. Don’t have the expectation that it will be the same as in SL, because it won’t be. Feelings, situations, they are different, no matter how great your time may be. When you meet someone in RL, be prepared that it might be the end of your SL relationship .. basically what I am trying to say is, you will never know how it goes down, you will never know how it will end, but I guarantee you, it will never be the way you have had it planned.

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